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+> Dear Miss Postnews:
+>
+> How long should my signature be?
+>
+> -- verbose@noisy
+
+Dear Verbose:
+
+Please try and make your signature as long as you can. It's much more
+important than your article, of course, so try and have more lines of
+signature than actual text.
+
+Try and include a large graphic made of ASCII characters, plus lots of cute
+quotes and slogans. People will never tire of reading these pearls of wisdom
+again and again, and you will soon become personally associated with the joy
+each reader feels at seeing yet another delightful repeat of your signature.
+
+Be sure as well to include a complete map of USENET with each signature, to
+show how anybody can get mail to you from any site in the world. Be sure to
+include ARPA gateways as well. Also tell people on your own site how to mail
+to you. Give independent addresses for Internet, UUCP, BITNET, Arpanet and
+CSNET, even if they're all the same.
+
+Aside from your reply address, include your full name, company and
+organization. It's just common courtesy -- after all, in some newsreaders
+people have to type an *entire* keystroke to go back to the top of your
+article to see this information in the header.
+
+By all means include your phone number and street address in every single
+article. People are always responding to usenet articles with phone calls
+and letters. It would be silly to go to the extra trouble of including this
+information only in articles that need a response by conventional channels!
+
+Em